breaking habbits

Your inclinations and habitual behaviors are leading you to do what?

Sometimes, we are led by habbit to exactly the place we want to be in because our habbits have positive results. (You feel inclined to compliment those who deserve it, and it brings you joy to make someone else feel their worth.) Other times, we are led by habbit to exactly the place we're used to being in, but really don't enjoy. (You feel inclined to mock or pick at those who are easy targets to suffice your insecurities, but it only worsens your respect for yourself.) There are tons of examples as to how our habbits make or break us... and it's up to us if we're going to let the habbits that break us live, or if we're going to strive off of our positive inclinations.

It had been my habbit for years (and still is to a degree) to be involved in my parents dysfunctional marriage and feel responsible for their happiness. The gravity of the situation only recently dawned on me, and the idea that it was habitual was even newer. Upon really realizing my circumstances, well first.. I cried. Then once tucked away some of my overflowing emotions, I realized that it was a decision I would have to make to either continue feeling hurt and unhappy with every argument that I allowed myself to take part in (even if it meant as much as just listening and thinking up resposes to their arguments with one another), or to really and truly uninvolve and uninvest myself in something that was ultimately having a negative effect on my well being. Well, I'm still at that stage where I'm choosing to break my detrimental habbit (because it is a process), but just knowing that I'm moving along has made such a large difference.

It seems as though the process is as follows: First, realize your habbit. Second, realize the negative effects it's having on your life, your soul, and your morality. Third, want to disconnect from that negativity. Last... well, I'm thinking, impliment your strenghts in areas that can offer positive results forming new and fulfilling habbits, and leave behind those habbits that were essentially keeping you chained to negativity.

It's been hard to break away when I live in a house with my parents and being around them is so constant... which is part of the reason why for a long time i was just dying to move out of my house (i still feel this way, on certain days more than others)... but i think what's important is that I know I need to not only free myself from the habbits I've formed on the surface with my parents, but free myself from all of the detriments I picked up along the way; ie thinking love is unattainable, thinking I am incapable of being in a happy relationship because I'm so used to one that fails, thinking that I am destined to give up on the people I do love because that has been my surroundings.

I feel good about breaking these habbits, because I know they're for the best. (the third step..wanting to disconnect). And I'm finding ways to do so.


I just really think it's important for us as people to step back and evaluate our habbits... because if we don't, some day we might find ourselves so far tangled in a mess of unfulfilling rituals that we lose those sparks that reside within each of us to do good things!

so yeah, what habbit do you want to break? ...what habbit do you want to develope more?