inquiries i'd appreciate input on
1. what are your views on "gender roles"?
2. can you fully love and fully live as an individual simultaneously?
3. are your answers going to affect mine in any way? (this is a trick question.. muahaha).. still, i'd like to hear some voices other than my own.
so i've discovered facebook. haha.. what a cool connector. (that sounds so lame. ha.. that's alright, i enjoy being fruity)
i'm really excited for school. really fricking excited.
jodi, judy and i met these really interesting fellas from Brown the other night at college perk.. they were doin a road trip from RI to New Orleans, coffee-house-hopping with their original songs guiding the way. (sound like a familiar mission?..yeah, too bad it didn't work out for us.) anyway, one of the two, jeff, kept looking at us in awe as we were talking about whatever "proactive" topic at hand.. and so we finally asked him why he was so amazed with us.. and basically he went into this whole schpeal (is that really a word? is that how it's spelled? no one ever answers my aside-questions) about how he couldn't believe that we were such "go getter" type people, and females.
at the time it didn't anger me at all, and really, it still doesn't.. just because i'm not the angry type.. but looking back, it was sort of ignorant eh, whatever.. at least we gave him something more to muse over. and he was definitely a cool guy. it was actually really good...
anyway, he had some valid marks to make.. he asked us, for example, if because we are such "strong minded individuals" guys were afraid of us.. or intimidated? (the answer was pretty much yes)
but then! ben (the other fella) just kind of smirked and said, "it's not that they're afraid.. it's that they're impressed" (i liked this answer much more)
but i'm wondering now, if it's possible for two people of any sex to be in a relationship with out being in a compitition. i believe it is.. or have hope anyway. i've been in a few of the sort. (friendships and such) they've always be the most meaningful ones. but it's interesting how one person always seems to take the dominate role. is equality in a relationship really attainable? should we even be reaching for it? i think maybe what we should be striving for more than equality, is respect of individuality... even if ones individuality consists of insecurities. that's just who we are. so yeah, i answered my questions to a degree.
what do you think?
posted by Rachael @ 29.7.05
6 comments
6 Comments:
1. In a marriage, male is technically the 'head of the house', but there's a huge difference between this and having the female be not-equal. The concept of male and female being one flesh in a marriage is such a cool image.
2. See the one flesh concept above. To be one with another is, yes, to lose the individual identity. The question is:
a) Does losing this distniction between you and the other mean that you will somehow be unable to do stuff you want? I should hope not
b) Is this concept of "fully living as an individual" so important that you can't "fully love"? That'd be pretty dumb, I think.
3. Well that's not my job, that'd be His.
And as for the guys and their ignorance, maybe they've never encountered such as you. In that case, don't be insulted. The whole world is not as Columbia. You're dangerously close to imposing standards on someone else who you've never even met (that being his community), and that almost seems un-Rachael to me.
It's "spiel", not schpeal. German for game/play.
Goes to show that someone does answer your aside questions but completely ignores the other questions. haha.
i just want to clerify some.. the guy wasn't ignorant at all... typed out it might seem so.. but he was definitely an intelligent person.
yeah, i got sort of tripped up on those questions too after our conversation with them. nontheless, totally an awesome experience of meeting "strangers" with complete comfort and open exchange of ideas. but its crazy because i'm not trying to sacrafice my individuality to be in a relationship; that just seems like cutting off my arm or something. so there's gonna have to be some way for "respect of eachothers individualities" to occur.. and that's that! haha.
1.
I think the roles that define a man or a woman were actually the work of several hundreds of years of indoctrination by the church. There has to be balance between the two but who is to say how women must behave towards men or vice versa. Gay couples have their man and woman role too. So the concept is good, but I can't say who should be what. That depends on the relationship between two persons.
2.
I doubt if I’ll ever know. Right now, I would say ‘no’ though.
3.
They most definitely will not, because you’re wiser than I am.
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